inspiring words

I found the most amazing blog today. So Inspiring for someone about to chuck everything in the wind and take the ultimate risk.

http://www.todayisthatday.com/blog/when-one-door-closes-another-door-opens

Or is it really the ultimate risk? Date now is set ( still unofficial but this will be it even lovely other half in agreement) that on 16th March 2009 I will really really become self employed. For better or worse, success or fai------. Not even going to write the word since it aint going to happen.

You make your own fate, make your own future and you are who ever you want to be!

And now I will be me. Possibly for the first time since I went to Uni to get away from long term unemployment and no future. Well I have no future in my dead end job. Friends will say "ah but you always do this" and yes I do. I quit jobs whenever it takes my fancy. I temp, I get "freedom" whatever that really means. In the end tho I still go back to slogging it out for an employer. Alright a different employer but after awhile the new wonderful job goes sour - or maybe I just come to my senses and see what my life really is like and then I start the whole routine again. I hate work, hate my job, apply for loads of new jobs in all different fields etc etc etc. Well this time its going to be different cos I AM IN CONTROL! maybe I will F--l. But I intend to give it my best shot and yey! I will be self employed. My own boss. All my life I dreamed I would do this. Dreamed it could be done but NEVER have I HAD THE COURAGE NEEDED to make it really happen. Strangely I had the courage in 1994 to go and do GCSE maths and a pre-access course and just go for it and apply for Applied Chemistry at uni! Me who left school with nothing and was considered a "thick kid". And when I did it it was a game. I never believed I could do it. My friends encouraged me and it changed my life. Then having achieved this life changing monumental thing I gave up and took rubbish dead end jobs - drifting from one to another for the last 10 years - and believe me when you have been a homeless unemployed for 10 years since you left school and considered yourself the lowest of the low (and thats not even considering what the general folk on the street thought of the likes of me and my street life compatriots!) then this was BIG! Now its time it seems to do it again but this time I wont have a grants system or student loan to help. Its just going to be me, my products and my (hopefully) buying public. I cant wait. Infact has to be said it is 10 years since I finished my degree ( June 1999) so it must be a 10 year thingy or approximate where big decisions just seem to occur and I go for it and take risks. Well maybe. The only risk last time was my fear of failure and everyone I new taking the piss. It mattered tho and it felt important to me to pass and pass well. I will have to try and be aware in 10 years time what I am doing. Maybe I will get to retire then. Who knows. I doubt that tho cos I dont expect to make a million but if I can just survive, pay the mortgage, pay the bills and eat that will be just fine. Anyway this really is going to be it. Giving Notice in to employer of 16th February and believe its 4 weeks. They might even pay me to go earlier - well you have to hope. Dont expect that will really happen. I actually have my Grievance meeting next tuesday so we will see. No idea how that will go but the Union has confirmed if I leave or move jobs they will continue to fight for me whatever so here goes. They owe me £800, they owe me a contract and they will hopefully have to pay up! Either way I have absolutely zero to lose since the T&G will sort it. They will end up paying one way or another even if not to me so thats fine.

Oh - soap. I made 480 mini bars on saturday/sunday ( once they cure of course) so should be fine for the BVF now and have to let Charlie know so he can include it in the advertising. So if you fancy visiting Brackencraft on 21st March at BVF and spending on anything you will get a free mini bar of soap. I shall try to make more this weekend but am waiting on a supplier now. Got Rugby market this saturday so thats good. Now it will begin....................