Friday at last

I forgot to set alarm last night and didnt wake till 7:55 today. Lucky to get to work on time. Mind you feel better than have felt for weeks so probably good to sleep longer occassionally. Have been averaging about 5 and a half to 6 hours a night and I know I do best on 8-10 hours so no wonder have been feeling a bit knackered. 95 pepes get laid off at today at Unipart where M works. All temps but very worrying. I feel so sorry for em at xmas. They have little chance of another job right now I suspect. They are talking about redundancies in January too. M will more than likely be on the list since hes only been there for 3 and a half years. We are going to be stuffed unless our markets take off big time. Still I suppose it could really be a new beginning for us if we can just stay positive. The Govt breaks will more than likely not apply to us either cos it turns out altho we got our mortgage thru Alliance & leicester its actually with a company called SPML and they are part of Lehman Brothers group who went down in the US. No idea if we will be able to defer our interest for 2 years like every one else. Anyway other than that tis friday, tis a market day tomorrow and sunday and tis only 20 days till xmas. cant wait. We are not going to do any markets from 25th to 3rd or even possibly 10th Jan so we will actually get some time to look after our dogs properly ( they wont get a decent walk this weekend since we will leave and return in the dark poor lads) and have a rest. have a big xmas market on sunday so hopefully we will take lots of money and then we can realy start to plan and to believe in the business. Right now its hopeful but has yet to prove itself. I have so much to sort out tonight for it..........even taking a heater that I bought last year for the sheds. Strangely - cos its work- I am dead excited about it. Its our 2nd week and I just have this feeling we are going to do really well...........
Ive been considering my own options jobswise. Well who knows what the future will hold. I dont think I would be able to go back into a lab now..........altho apparently cos I am a manufacturer of soap etc I can apply to be a CChem which I may have to do. Well have to comply with GLP etc and theres quite a lot of routine chem in my chosen profession even if it is basic such as pH testing and H&S and COSHH and interpreting stuff like allergens for labelling etc. You know I do like that "my chosen profession " bit!!!! Its all an accident but it really really is my chosen profession isnt it! How weird is life. I left chem for ever to do office work only to find a way to do permanent real chem. Now that has encouraged me that has. Have to get round to doing company accounts soon tho.........hate this bit......cos have now over 6 weeks to sort and the hours are mounting up. There have been lots of transactions in and out too so its going to be hassle. A month of receipts usually takes me at least a day to sort out. Still I am off at xmas tho will have to do at least 1 days accounting. I need to find an accountant too now I think since this I feel is going to be big. Its just a shame I had to waste money doing the PGCE year really cos that is draining my current income. Tho if I had chosen a different pathway maybe I would not have found my way to where i am now.......Hmmm...... yes getting a bit mystical here. I dont really believe in fate as such but I do beleive you get to chose a pathway from several possible ones and the choice you make causes where you finaly end up.........if you see what i mean. Mind you I am no where near to the final end yet. This is just the begginning. Hey I am so happy today. I think the hard bit is deciding where you want to head for and once you take that desicion the going there is just easy. For months I have been wanting to give up the job and do markets etc but it was just a dream -now I am doing both ( job and markets that is!) and have already made the desision I needed. I just have to wait for the right time and carry the plan forward. Maybe its the risky nature of it all that makes it so exciting. I think I just dont want to live in a safe nice comfy world. I have to risk everything on a reasonably regular basis. Thats who I am. Either I will end up very rich or very broke but then I came from the bottom of the pile living in a homeless persons shelter and no qualifications etc so who knows so far so good. I just dont believe we are going to go under. There is a way of thinking that you make your own luck in life. I always believe stuff and it happens so maybe that is true. So in that case all I have to do is put in the hours, believe and make it happen and we will have our freedom ( as much as anyone in this world does) and be self employed and make lots of money or at least as much as we need cos I have no particular need to be a millionaire. Just to be free. Its friday tho and I am going to make it happen tomorrow onwards. Wait and see. Incidentally "Make it Happen" is a song by a band called A Look Inside. they didnt get very far, they are/were all very close mates of mine. ( My Ex housemate is best known and currently having a revival as Guitarist in the SECT) and this song inspired me to do just that. I went and got GCSE Maths and then my degree ( all because of a song and something quite psycadelic - I was young then tho and it was the 90s!)
But it still changed me and my life forever..............The POWER OF MUSIC!